FUNDING
OPERATIONS REQUEST
Filed by Management. Ignored by Reggie.
“Every dollar helps.VIEW PAYMENT OPTIONS
Allegedly.”
AVAILABLE FUNDING DEPARTMENTS
HAY FUND
Supports feed, hay, animal snacks, and the basic nutritional needs of staff members who have never once completed paperwork.
GOAT CONTAINMENT FUND
Supports fencing, gates, latches, repairs, and future failures caused by the Chaos Division.
INFRASTRUCTURE REPAIR FUND
Supports damage caused by Dozer, weather, questionable planning, and slow-moving geological decisions.
SECURITY OPERATIONS
Supports perimeter patrol, suspicious bucket investigations, and official threat assessments involving pinecones.
POLLINATION OPERATIONS
Supports Lazy Llama Bees & Honey, hive equipment, flowers, and the airborne employees.
GENERAL CHAOS FUND
For everything management failed to predict, prevent, repair, explain, or properly budget for.
OFFICIAL RANCH SUPPORTER HONOR ROLL
THE LEDGER OF RESPONSIBLE ENABLERS
These individuals have contributed to ongoing ranch instability and have been formally recognized by management. Reggie has not acknowledged them, which is normal.
| Supporter | Amount | Recognition Title | Official Ranch Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Example Donor Name | $25 | Hay Contributor | Helped stabilize snack operations for approximately several minutes. |
| Example Family | $50 | Containment Assistant | Contributed to fencing efforts. Goat Division remains unimpressed. |
| Example Business | $100 | Infrastructure Witness | Assisted with repairs related to suspiciously tortoise-adjacent damage. |
| Your Name Here | $--- | Pending Appointment | Awaiting official paperwork and possible snack-related review. |
To update this section, edit the supporter names, amounts,
recognition titles, and ranch notes directly inside this table.
Donors may also be listed anonymously if preferred.
$5+
Snack Economy Stabilizer
$25+
Hay Fund Contributor
$50+
Containment Assistant
$100+
Executive Oversight Board
NEW RANCH SUPPORT OPTION
🍎 BUY REGGIE AN APPLE
A small donation. A real apple. A very official snack-based support event.
For $5, you or your child can buy Reggie an apple.
We will personally feed Reggie the apple, record a short video, and tell him who it came from.
Example: “Reggie, this apple is from Emma in Texas.”
The video will be emailed back to you after the apple has been delivered to Executive Leadership.
$5
Official Apple Delivery
PAYMENT OPTIONS
PAYPAL
Use this option for standard online support payments. Replace the button link below with your real PayPal link.
SUPPORT WITH PAYPAL
CASH APP
Use this option for fast support payments. Replace the button link below with your real Cash App link.
SUPPORT WITH CASH APP
LOCAL SUPPORT
For local arrangements, sponsor questions, or larger support ideas, contact ranch management directly.
CONTACT THE RANCH